It seems that love is no longer about how we are with each other, but instead how we can materially appease one another

Photo: Organic Trade Association

One of my co-workers mentioned in late December how the 31^st hadn’t even come and gone and already the local stores were putting up their Valentine’s Day displays. No one had time to recover emotionally, let alone financially, from holiday sticker shock, before being reminded that yet again, they had to buy their friends’, family’s and paramours’ love with gifts of wine, chocolate and roses.

With each passing year, I hear the dread in those around me grow at Valentine’s Day and all that it entails. A day that is, in theory, supposed to be all about love, seems to be about nothing but stress. Where to get dinner, what to order, what to wear, what gifts to buy, and so on and so forth. It becomes a production with a questionable return on investment.

It seems that love is no longer about how we are with each other, but instead how we can materially appease one another. The idea of spontaneous and genuine expressions of love have been supplanted by staged commercialism. This begs the question of whether, in light of this, we really know what love is any more.

If love can cause so much tension, is it actually love?

As we can see from just one day a year, what we term “love” these days actually seems to be more a set of conditions or expectations for doling out one’s affections, more than anything else.

The key here would be the expectations that we as individuals, as well as a society, place on love. Once we remove these expectations, then there would be neither room for disappointment, nor a need for a day to ostensibly love one another, as it would be inherent in our every action and interaction.

This is a task much more easily said than done. If it were so easy, we would all be doing it already. Unconditional love is actually spiritual in nature since it goes, and takes us beyond, the five senses, mind and intellect where our expectations reside. It is also why most of us tend to misunderstand unconditional love—because we are so outwardly focused on input from the five senses, mind and intellect. Given this, the first and most important step we can take in developing unconditional love would be a spiritual one. That is, undertaking spiritual practice, where the journey goes inward and where we examine ourselves, as opposed to looking outward for validation.

Another key here is practice. It is not something that will necessarily happen overnight. Practice makes perfect, which would hold true even when learning to love unconditionally.

Maybe this year, instead of worrying ourselves about “love” on one day, we can try to develop and express it unconditionally every day.

Facts from Wikipedia

• The U.S. Greeting Card Association estimates that approximately 190 million valentines are sent each year in the US. Millions of people use, every year, digital means of creating and sending Valentine’s Day greeting messages such as e-cards, love coupons or printable greeting cards.
• Mother’s Day continues to be one of the most commercially successful U.S. occasions. According to the National Restaurant Association, Mother’s Day is now the most popular day of the year to dine out at a restaurant in the United States.
• According to IBISWorld, a publisher of business research, Americans will spend approximately $2.6 billion on flowers, $1.53 billion on pampering gifts—like spa treatments—and another $68 million on greeting cards.
• Mother’s Day will generate about 7.8% of the U.S. jewelry industry’s annual revenue in 2008, with custom gifts like mother’s rings.

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Read more:

• What is spiritual love?
• What spiritual practice can I do?
• Lessons learnt from the kitchen sink
• What is actually important after all?

Some thoughts on what should really scare us about Halloween

Trick or treat

I have noticed an interesting phenomenon surrounding Halloween. 364.25 days a year, cobwebs are no good and eyesores. For some of us, they are downright scary (because where there’s a web, there’s a spider). Yet on October 31st, cobwebs are considered decoration and ‘cool’, as opposed to a sign that we’ve gotten lax in our domestic duties.

In fact, Halloween is sort of a get-out-of-jail-free card for many people. The one day a year where women (and men) can get away with cavorting around in their undergarments without getting arrested, when toilet papering houses, throwing eggs, vandalism and violence is almost acceptable. Police are out in force to deter any criminal mischief-making, and often shrug off otherwise reprehensible behavior as ‘Halloween always brings out the crazies’.

Add to this, haunted houses, conducting seances or use of ouija boards in fun and jest, to (pun intended) “get into the spirit of things”. At a spiritual level we can agree, this can’t be good. Aside from the obvious increase in Raja-Tama that such behavior creates, it also is a gateway for many other spiritual problems, such as possession . So many people suffer from haunted houses, trouble from ancestors, and so on. And yet on Halloween, the suffering these issues cause people, are forgotten in large part if not outright admired.

Rarely do we take into consideration the impact it has on us, at any level. And in fact, if we look a little closer, it should be apparent to anyone and give us pause. It was a day historically given to remembering dead souls (Ref: Wikipedia). However it has turned into a festivity of the underworld, which we humans actively promote and instigate. It has in essence become a source of negativity which we could have control over. This is compared to similar phenomena such as full and new moons, the impact of which is natural and out of our control. By contrast, Halloween and its resultant negative energy is within man’s control, and yet we continue to engage in a way that is severely detrimental to society and mankind as a whole.

As such, the more we actively engage in celebrating and participating in Halloween, the more the detrimental effect it has. It’s no longer about pretending to be someone or something else for a day or night. In fact, at a spiritual level, we do transform; we become an antenna and beacon for negative energy.

Talk about scary.

SSRF’s press release on Halloween

Halloween celebration invites possession by ghosts and demons, especially if celebrated repeatedly, finds a study conducted by SSRF

MELBOURNE / NEW JERSEY (26 October 2011) – A basic law of spiritual science states that ‘The word, touch, form, taste, smell and its related energy coexist’. This means – where the name and form of ghosts, demons or negative energies exist, such as on Halloween, their distressing energy is present too. As the form and colour of the decorations and costumes used in Halloween celebration are similar to that of ghosts, they act as antennae to attract a lot of negative distressing energy.

Read the full press release on Halloween celebration…

Read more:

• God’s forms denigrated during Halloween
• Halloween increases the probability of attack by ghosts

]]> http://spiritualresearchfoundation.org/blog/spiritualperspective/1776/trick-or-treat/feed/ 2 http://spiritualresearchfoundation.org/blog/spiritualperspective/1241/lessons-learnt-from-the-kitchen-sink/ http://spiritualresearchfoundation.org/blog/spiritualperspective/1241/lessons-learnt-from-the-kitchen-sink/#comments Mon, 19 Apr 2010 05:57:07 +0000 Sharon http://spiritualresearchfoundation.org/blog/?p=1241 For as long as I have lived in the ashram I have wondered why the kitchen, which feeds 250 to 300 seekers daily, has only one kitchen sink. But I maintained an attitude of learning and tried not to comment on what I felt could have been done more logically…. but the question never went away from my mind.

How could it? Every time one was at the sink and trying to wash the dishes for a span of two hours or so, someone or the other would gently intervene and request to either fill a small container of water to clean the counter with, or rinse their hands between cooking, or they needed the sink as they felt like a cup of tea, the seeker about to chop cilantro would bring her colander to rinse the leaves and the one who wanted to churn buttermilk would require the sink as well … and so the flow of users remained uninterrupted!

So the heap of dishes would get washed at a staggered but even pace that took into account all the interruptions.  No one ever questioned the absence of another sink. One kitchen sink was accepted as a way of life. Everyone was content.

I tried hard to align myself with everyone, always thinking that a couple more sinks would have been the more efficient way to go.

Suddenly, only a couple days ago a new understanding suddenly slid into my consciousness.  This sink was nothing but God’s ‘Divine Design’!  I had been using my limited intellect all this while. But Spirituality is beyond the intellect. So I had to look beyond the illogical scenario and see the real purpose that this kitchen sink was fulfilling. I realized that God did not merely want dishes to be washed. He wanted to create divinity within seekers.

This sink put one on the spot as it had the potential to precipitate the flaws within one – the slightest bit of irritation could easily be perceived by the interrupting seeker who now stood right beside one. So one’s patience had to develop and one’s love had to develop too, so that each interaction was gentle and friendly and even sublime.

The kitchen sink interruptions have served as a time to nudge the other and say something uplifting, share some advice or correct a mistake like ‘you have the tap open too wide, you‘re wasting water’.  Washing dishes for those two hours was really merely an excuse for the big picture which was that each of us was getting a chance to be washed up and sorted out on the inside.

Our Kitchen Sink has given us practical lessons on how to be in complete acceptance mode and has even got me to learn how to go beyond my intellect. Without this divinely orchestrated discomfort, where would we have got this almost laboratory like situation that induces internal transformation?

by

Sharon Clarke Sequeira

SSRF team member

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Read more:

• The concept of Swechchaa, Parechchaa and Ishwarechchaa in spiritual practice and growth
• Gratitude and spiritual closeness among seekers experienced in the āshram
• If the student is willing, the Guru is always teaching

Having gratitude for what has been given to us by God is an important aspect in the development of spiritual emotion. A few days ago, I witnessed one such example of gratitude.

Living in an āshram (hermitage) where SSRF has its research centre in Goa is not like living at home. It is a very spartan lifestyle and the frills and luxuries that are available to us at home are not available in the āshram. However seekers of God transcend their need for these luxuries as for them, the benefits of living in an āshram, far outweigh worldly luxuries with respect to the āshram providing a conducive environment for spiritual development. At a more advanced stage, seekers experience a deeper sense of gratitude for what they are getting from God and the Guru principle and for having the privilege of living in the āshram.

Yoya and Cyriaque, two former international models have been living at the SSRF research centre along with their daughter Anastasia for many months to serve the spread of the spiritual research. Both these seekers have experienced the high life of an international model with fancy hotels, airlines and travel and being pampered while on shoots. Yet when they were in the āshram they blended in completely with its way of life and strived to achieve what is expected out of a seeker.

When leaving they posted the following note on the āshram notice board.

When His Holiness Dr. Athavale heard about the note, He asked to share it with our readers as there is much to be learnt from Cyriaque and Yoya’s yearning for spiritual growth and developing of spiritual closeness with other seekers.

Atul Dighe

Editor

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Read more:

• What is actually important after all?
• SSRF seeker Satyawan Kadam attains Sainthood
• Start your spiritual journey

I recently came across an article on luxury homes in the US, and it made me wonder if the people who are extremely wealthy were truly happy. Lasting happiness is the underlying reason why we would want to be rich right?

I have some very close family friends who would be considered extremely wealthy. Of the many families I know that fall into this category, one stands out in particular, as they own several aircrafts for personal use. In fact, when their daughter got married, they spent over $3000 per guest just on accommodations, without breaking a sweat. This did not include the favours and gifts bestowed upon those close enough to be considered family. But then I reflected could their wealth ensure their daughter’s happiness in her future married life? And the answer was a definite no. If wealth cannot ensure this basic need in our lives then why is there a fascination for the lifestyles of the rich and famous?

For us common folk too materialism permeates throughout our lives in one way or the other. In fact for most of the people I know, their value system and purpose in life revolves around making money, getting rid of debt or looking for some luxury that they think would make them happy. And until I came in touch with SSRF and spiritual science concepts I have to say that I shared these same values and purpose in life.

Study of Spirituality under SSRF has shaped my opinions with regards to what is actually important in life – that is if we step back and look at it from an absolute perspective. At the end of the day, when my time has come to leave this world, will it really have mattered how much money or debt I had? The only debt that I should worry about is my spiritual debt or give-and-take account, because that will follow me from lifetime to lifetime. It will determine the level of happiness or unhappiness I will have to undergo in this lifetime and subsequent lifetimes. Spiritual practice is the only thing that helps to burn our spiritual debt or give-and-take account or give us the strength to bear it.

With this perspective, all our efforts in acquiring a livelihood and various luxuries if at all, need to be geared to our true purpose of life which is liberation from the cycle of birth and death and God-realisation.

Maya Jairam

SSRF team member

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Read more:

• Benefits of spiritual practice
• Guide to a saattvik lifestyle
• If the student is willing, the Guru is always teaching